findingnoo

So I was today years old when I found a rather large missing piece of me that has been bugging me for a really really long time. My OCD has been playing up big time lately. Over the past year it has been creeping quietly back in but the past month or so it had been particularly bad. So I did what I always do.... Research. I took to YouTube and searched. The first thing that popped up was a video that was a therapists thoughts on how OCD is really PTSD. It kind of felt like something clicked in me. It made me start thinking about the possible link between my disorder and my (undiagnosed) PTSD and how it made a whole lot of sense to me that they could be connected. I let it steep in my mind for a couple of days and then we arrived at today. Today was my second day off in a little while where I have spent time alone. I started my day as I begin most.... Watching Tiktok for an obscene amount of time - trying to correct this habit as i'm not 12 and have adult responsibilities -__- ...

• |Trigger warning.| • The following contains adult content, my experience with mental, verbal and emotional abuse, mental health struggles. Reader discretion is advised. ❤ 🌱 At 18 years old I had decided what I was going to do. I was in love. Oh, so in love. Within two years I was a full time carer for my ex partner. It was a lot. To be honest it felt like the worlds easiest decision. Like, who wouldn't want to spend every waking hour with the person they love? -hint of sarcasm, isnt hindsight fun?! Fast forward to 2013 to when I was 23 and he ended our relationship. This was one of the most painful days of my entire life. I rang my mum – I don't remember this but I'm guessing it was pretty emosh. I had to ask my mum if it was okay for me to move back home, she was incredibly understanding and said yes in a heartbeat. Within a few hours I was on her front doorstep. -would you believe me if i told you that i hung the washing out before i left? -__- I was in so mu...